I’m Not Overreacting - You’re Just Not Listening

4/18/20251 min read

I cannot tell you how many times I’ve been silent when I wanted to speak up. Just as equally, how many times I’ve spoke up and my feelings were dismissed. Talk about hurt. Whew!

To know me is to know how soft-spoken and gentle I am. I’ve never been one to argue. I don’t like going back and forth because then voices are raised, and I don’t like raising my voice, nor do I like anyone raising their voice at me.

During a trying season of my life, I remember talking to someone about how I wanted to improve on my communication skills. In the same conversation, they said something that hurt my feelings. Just as gentle as can be, I told them in that moment that what they said hurt me. They swore up and down it didn’t hurt and that I was overreacting. They completely dismissed my pain. That left me confused because the feeling that I felt wasn’t for them to decide.

My truth = what they said hurt.
Their truth = they didn’t intend for it to hurt.
The truth = they failed to take accountability for the hurt they caused me.

I decide to tell MY TRUTH and I’m "overreacting". No, I’m not overreacting - you’re just not listening. You’re not listening with the intent to understand my point of view, but instead, you want to listen to respond.

I was on edge for months and had to talk myself down, day in and day out, Reassuring myself daily that my feelings are very much valid. I don’t have to dismiss them because you don’t agree or understand them.

Not long ago, I made up in my mind that I’m going to speak up for myself, even if my voice trembles while doing so.

Do me a favor?
Honor your voice.
Honor your feelings.

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